I became a mom a few months before turning 38 years old, and as an accomplished career woman and feminist, it has caught me completely by surprise how much I love every second of it and have no desire to ever leave my baby again! Becoming a mother has changed me beyond expectations, and I feel like I have found a peace that not much else has given me - and that is saying something given how dedicated I was to my work helping women around the world.
Pregnancy took both my partner and I by surprise, but it has changed our world in a way that neither one of us thought possible and couldn’t have understood before having Lucano Finn Di Bella Zaaroura.
I loved every moment of my pregnancy - minus the heartburn (as you can see, he has a lot of hair and was born that way). I loved seeing my body change and grow, and feel what a woman’s body can do to create life and protect it. Giving birth made me feel like superwoman and at the same time, so insignificant in the face of this incredible experience. The challenges of breastfeeding and protecting this tiny creature humbled me and my partner, and this little monkey has taught us more about ourselves than anything before.
Lucano has filled our world with an incomparable joy. He is naturally a playful, happy baby and has a way of mischievously teasing my husband and I, since he was a couple of months old, making us laugh at his antics.
I am only doing this once, so now all I do is try to memorize and cherish these fleeting moments with him, as he gallops through the months and milestones - and still lets me cuddle him close and cover his face with kisses!
1) if you had to list one thing your little one does that melts your heart, what would it be?
There are so many things he does, like throwing me mischievous looks as he tries to escape being clothed (he loves to roll around naked!) or how he touches my face when he goes to sleep or wakes up to feel me there next to him .... but if I had to list one (!!!): At 5 months old, Lucano tapped my hand one day and said “mamma” clearly. My heart stopped for what felt like a noticeable time and then just melted into a puddle. Now he says it when he is upset or wants to nurse and every time I want to just sit and cry like a baby at the pure joy it brings to hear him say “mamma”.
2) on the flip side what is one thing you could do without?
I am sure eventually I will have something (or many) that I can do without but right but right now there’s really nothing ... or maybe it would be that he doesn’t screech like I’m torturing him if I try to put cream or sunblock on his face!
Please leave Mayssam comments and share the love for the courage she’s taken in sharing her story.
Irina Fortey is an Ottawa and Toronto Documentary Photographer.
Capturing your everyday in the most beautiful way, candidly and unscripted.
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